HOW SHOULD ONE REALLY HANDLE IT?

 

Affection and
feelings definitely go hand in hand. If one has feelings for whomever, it
is tantamount to affection. In this part of the world, Africa, it is highly
frowned upon when a girl tells a guy how she feels about him, especially in Nigeria.

 

The origin of girls being pursued and not the pursuer comes
from the bible. After all the bible says “he that finds a wife has found a good
thing” which is the ideology we Nigerians follow as we are very religious.

 Also my forefathers told their offspring, who passed it on to their own offspring, and so it went
from generation to generation that it is a taboo for a girl to outrightly tell
a guy how she feels; off course they must have said they were more subtle approach,
I really don’t know.  And so it went on till now. Imagine I meet my mother and tell her “mom I’m so into this dude and I
am just gonna tell him”. Oooolala! That very day my own don done. They go call
family meeting for my head.

 

And if I choose to be rebellious I can say “dear mother and family members this is the 21^st century,
thanks to E, MTV and DSTV we get to see that in jand, Yankee, and all ‘em
places that it’s no biggie and we can actually ask guys out and even tell them
how we feel. We girls aint the weaker sex but we are strong and capable of
doing anything we wanna do” (Yankee accent). I can even go on and say “after
all P.Square in their song said what a
man can do a woman can do to”. But na that very day I go know wetin e be
for panel beater to work on human being body because ma maale go don
tooooooooooooooooooooo beat me mehn, ommooooo!  

 

In the western world it’s an everyday thing for a girl to tell a guy she digs him. It really doesn’t matter
to our folks if it was the British that colonised us; the ish is we must not copy their nonsensical culture. But if not for these people we still might have been roaming round the streets as
naked as a jay bird.

As a result when a guy even finally
walks up to a girl in Nigeria and proclaims his undying love, feelings and affection, she puts him on
a so long thing, remembering what mamma told her omo mi obirin gbodo niyi. Yeah that’s right a woman must have her self-respect and pride. She also goes around asking her friends, both the ones that dislike the guy and the ones that are tripping for the dude. I then ask myself who can one really ask about a dude who is loving up, your friends? Mom? Dad? Relatives? Who!

I’ve heard from several guys that if a girl walks up to him and says she likes him, if he digs her, that will be the beginning of their relationship and he will like and appreciate her more for that. Heard from another guy that asking a girl out and having to wait is pretty frustrating. So this brings me to a cross road.

These questions go through my head when a guy asks a girl out should she just
tell him straight up if she is interested?

If she wants to go get opinion from friends or whoever how long is too
long?

Should a girl really tell a guy how she feels?