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Tuesday, March 29, 2011

HOW SHOULD ONE REALLY HANDLE IT?



 
Affection and
feelings
definitely go hand in hand. If one has feelings for whomever, it
is tantamount to affection. In this part of the world, Africa, it is highly
frowned upon when a girl tells a guy how she feels about him, especially in Nigeria.


 
The origin of girls being pursued and not the pursuer comes
from the bible. After all the bible says “he that finds a wife has found a good
thing” which is the ideology we Nigerians follow as we are very religious.
 Also my forefathers told their offspring, who passed it on to their own offspring, and so it went
from generation to generation that it is a taboo for a girl to outrightly tell
a guy how she feels; off course they must have said they were more subtle approach,
I really don’t know.  And so it went on till now. Imagine I meet my mother and tell her “mom I’m so into this dude and I
am just gonna tell him”. Oooolala! That very day my own don done. They go call
family meeting for my head.


 
And if I choose to be rebellious I can say “dear mother and family members this is the 21st century,
thanks to E, MTV and DSTV we get to see that in jand, Yankee, and all ‘em
places that it’s no biggie and we can actually ask guys out and even tell them
how we feel. We girls aint the weaker sex but we are strong and capable of
doing anything we wanna do” (Yankee accent). I can even go on and say “after
all P.Square in their song said what a
man can do a woman can do to”. But na that very day I go know wetin e be
for panel beater to work on human being body because ma maale go don
tooooooooooooooooooooo beat me mehn, ommooooo!
 


 
In the western world it’s an everyday thing for a girl to tell a guy she digs him. It really doesn’t matter
to our folks if it was the British that colonised us; the ish is we must not copy their nonsensical culture. But if not for these people we still might have been roaming round the streets as
naked as a jay bird.
As a result when a guy even finally
walks up to a girl in Nigeria and proclaims his undying love, feelings and affection, she puts him on
a so long thing, remembering what mamma told her omo mi obirin gbodo niyi. Yeah that’s right a woman must have her self-respect and pride. She also goes around asking her friends, both the ones that dislike the guy and the ones that are tripping for the dude. I then ask myself who can one really ask about a dude who is loving up, your friends? Mom? Dad? Relatives? Who!
I’ve heard from several guys that if a girl walks up to him and says she likes him, if he digs her, that will be the beginning of their relationship and he will like and appreciate her more for that. Heard from another guy that asking a girl out and having to wait is pretty frustrating. So this brings me to a cross road.
These questions go through my head when a guy asks a girl out should she just
tell him straight up if she is interested?
If she wants to go get opinion from friends or whoever how long is too
long?
Should a girl really tell a guy how she feels?


 



 

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

am so proud of u Fav and dis note as well is so frantic. I like ur dedication and u keep the light on. Tnks so much dearie
Bill

Akpene sponco anthony said...

In this 21'st century i dont think it is absurd or a big deal for a girl to tell a boy whatever or how she feels 4 him.

favsie said...

thanks sooooooooooooooo much bill dear.
ok tony cool cool cool,thanks dear

Anonymous said...

nice work miss fav

DON said...

OFCOURSE, IT IS COOL FOR A GIRL TO TELL A GUY HOW SHE FEELS! WELL DONE BLOGGGER!

Karo said...

Good!!!

favsie said...

thanks uncle karo, da donnnnnnnnnnnnnn ooooooooooooooose! mr annonymous bello thanks deary

Anonymous said...

fo 9ja fo a gee tu walk up to a guy, guy go giv am cheep tretment wic may lead tu cheatin, iz best dey gee hold her self ooo, cuz i don't tinkz lov iz stil exitin tu da level ooo, if a gee walk up tu me fo examp fo ma mind she won chop ma money ni oooo, girl shuld reel hold her self ooo may God can let me fel fo her too. faviz i ur u remix jooooo.@lordpharon

favsie said...

i don't get you pls but it's all good yeah@lordpharon

Stephanie said...

Fav.. thumbs for u on this article. we are in computer world now. there is no any big deal in it for a girl to walk up to a guy and express her wish. it happen around me here and they are happily married now. and things are working fine for both. Let's just forget all this old stuff that it's a taboo. Saame baba

favsie said...

oh really? cool. thanks deary

Anonymous said...

Ehn! Nice piece, first of all this deserves a rating below i comment, 5/5 (F**king perfect) with the mixture of vanacular and pidgin engilish it had humour that kept me reading till the last line. Kudos favour.

Me am on the neutral side, I think girls can get a guys attention to the fact that they love the guy without actually saying the word first. Give him the right signs, say nice words to him, like 'ur a cool guy, i like going out with cool guys'. Let him notice u, if he likes u too he'll walk up to u. If he still doesn't notice add more effort, if he still doesn't bulge, forget him, he doesn't like u. We guys we are so sensitive to every action or word from the ladies, so it wouldn't be difficult to tell a girl that likes u from one that doesn't. And guys just cos she shows u signs doesn't mean she's cheap, love is a swet feeling u just can't hide, so she gat to show it. It's just like having a beautiful car and not driving it. So when she expresses, if u digg, just talk to her, not necessarily about being friends but about life(anything) cos since she likes u and u like her ur both friends. ACTION SPEAKS LOUDER THAN WORDS.

Diddy

So said...

Lool. A word is enough 4 d wise.if ur parent say no,then no it is.

So said...

Loool. A girl underno circumstance shld tell a guy 'i luv u' nd 'want 2 court' .it's nt done!!! Here n nigeria esp has u'ave said.u parent's tel u d right tins. Immitating d western wrld s nt advicable. Obey ur parents,or rather listen.

favsie said...

diddy your comment rocks all the way! i feel you die. thanks dear. dunno who it is because of the name but thannks all the same dear.
thanks as well So,greatly appreciated.

Anonymous said...

Wel thanks 4 tellin d article. *Mrs favour Soyinka* on ma own opinion o .! If a girl lyks me & asks me out,outrightly she's lost her dignity nd i'l see her as a *SEX MACHINE*.instead let her show me signs nd attention & believe me GUYZ R VERY GOOD INTERPRETERS !

favsie said...

yeah cool, dunno who this is Mr.annonymous but nice one!

Anonymous said...

Miss favour, wid due respect, all your blogs are all good.
But on ma own part, for a lady to ask me out, i wud really count ma sef very very lucky. Cos there are lot of guys that are far better than me out there, so if she now came to approach me, i will always respect ha, and will neva let ha down cos i will c ha as a God sent angel to me.
So i c nothn bad in that! Ok?
Its Bishop Emmy.

favsie said...

thanks dear for your time and opinion. it's ok, i mean different strokes for different folks. greatly appreciated