FORGIVENESS

This life
is full of imperfection; buildings erected suddenly collapse within
a week, someone who you trust with everything in you messes up BIG TIME,
divorce, broken hearts, quarrels, fights, betrayal, all these happen for no
other reason other than our lack of perfection. Someone once said prepare your
mind for the worse than can happen so that when it finally does happen, you
won't find yourself hurt.

Humans
due to our inability to be perfect will always have flaws. Show me a
perfect man and I will show you one thousand flaws of his.That is why we as humans created in God's likely image our heavenly
father, the master of all perfection will always err.

The old
adage says to err is human: to FORGIVE is divine. If the one that err
sticks to this: no one becomes smaller by asking for forgiveness
and actually apologises the one who has been wronged should off course remember
that the one who forgives has a big heart. Not psychic but just
wondering what's going through the mind of that reader who has been severely
hurt "yeah yeah, whatever! Easier said than done, can never forgive Pedro
for breaking my heart". Seriously you have to let go simply because the
fact that you scaled through that phase in your life says a whole lot; what will hurt you won’t kill you, it will
only make you stronger and wiser.
So you see that you have not only become stronger, you have also become wiser!

Few days
back on a comment I saw on Facebook, someone was saying I can forgive but how
do you expect me to forget? Yeah I feel you on that, I mean we are human we can
never forget how much we were hurt except one develops permanent amnesia. So
that is where grace comes in, grace is the ability to do what ordinarily you
will not find yourself doing.

Unforgiveness
is a very bitter experience because it eats you up like a cankerworm, kills
your spirit, makes you mean to the person who has hurt you, sometimes even to
the world. It could even make you depressed because you leave all the hurt
bottled up and refuse to let go of the past. Remember life goes on and no one
is perfect.

To avoid
quarrels and disagreements always admit when you’re wrong. Do not be proud or
haughty, pride goes before a fall.

Forgive
so that you’ll be forgiven, refusing to forgive the one who has hurt you might
fill the heart of the one who hurt you with great guilt and misery. Let it all
go because trust me it is not worth the hassle.

yes dear you do have to forgive.

 

 

a hand withholding forgiveness

it's indeed a sweet feeling

not a bad idea!

there is this feeling of relief when one is forgiven

HOW SHOULD ONE REALLY HANDLE IT?

 

Affection and
feelings definitely go hand in hand. If one has feelings for whomever, it
is tantamount to affection. In this part of the world, Africa, it is highly
frowned upon when a girl tells a guy how she feels about him, especially in Nigeria.

 

The origin of girls being pursued and not the pursuer comes
from the bible. After all the bible says “he that finds a wife has found a good
thing” which is the ideology we Nigerians follow as we are very religious.

 Also my forefathers told their offspring, who passed it on to their own offspring, and so it went
from generation to generation that it is a taboo for a girl to outrightly tell
a guy how she feels; off course they must have said they were more subtle approach,
I really don’t know.  And so it went on till now. Imagine I meet my mother and tell her “mom I’m so into this dude and I
am just gonna tell him”. Oooolala! That very day my own don done. They go call
family meeting for my head.

 

And if I choose to be rebellious I can say “dear mother and family members this is the 21^st century,
thanks to E, MTV and DSTV we get to see that in jand, Yankee, and all ‘em
places that it’s no biggie and we can actually ask guys out and even tell them
how we feel. We girls aint the weaker sex but we are strong and capable of
doing anything we wanna do” (Yankee accent). I can even go on and say “after
all P.Square in their song said what a
man can do a woman can do to”. But na that very day I go know wetin e be
for panel beater to work on human being body because ma maale go don
tooooooooooooooooooooo beat me mehn, ommooooo!  

 

In the western world it’s an everyday thing for a girl to tell a guy she digs him. It really doesn’t matter
to our folks if it was the British that colonised us; the ish is we must not copy their nonsensical culture. But if not for these people we still might have been roaming round the streets as
naked as a jay bird.

As a result when a guy even finally
walks up to a girl in Nigeria and proclaims his undying love, feelings and affection, she puts him on
a so long thing, remembering what mamma told her omo mi obirin gbodo niyi. Yeah that’s right a woman must have her self-respect and pride. She also goes around asking her friends, both the ones that dislike the guy and the ones that are tripping for the dude. I then ask myself who can one really ask about a dude who is loving up, your friends? Mom? Dad? Relatives? Who!

I’ve heard from several guys that if a girl walks up to him and says she likes him, if he digs her, that will be the beginning of their relationship and he will like and appreciate her more for that. Heard from another guy that asking a girl out and having to wait is pretty frustrating. So this brings me to a cross road.

These questions go through my head when a guy asks a girl out should she just
tell him straight up if she is interested?

If she wants to go get opinion from friends or whoever how long is too
long?

Should a girl really tell a guy how she feels?

 

 

LOVE

LOVE.....A wonderful word,a strong word. it is known to make the world go round. it is the greatest gift of all.

The yorubas call it ife

 

The igbos call it ifunnaya

 

The calabars call it ime

The afrikaans call it liefde

The french call it l'amour

The italians call it  amore

 

The chinese call it 爱

 

The albanians call it dashuri 

 

The spanish call it el amor

 

The russians call it любовь

 

The bulgarians call it любов

 

The danish call it kærlighed

 

The dutch call it liefde

 

The polish call it miłość

 

The irish call it grá

And so it goes on and on but i simply call it love!
the simple definition i came up with is this
L-life:if you really do love someone you will willingly lay your life down for the person....biblically Jesus did.In titanic jack did.

O-obedience:you'll obey every word that comes out from the mouth of your loved one...the one who you say you love.you will listen attentively and do exactly as you are told.

V-valour:it sure does take great valour to love.it took great valour for Jesus to lay down his life for you and i on the cross believe you me. same as you deciding to love someone for life....it takes great courage because then you are sharing your heart,soul,body with this one person for life!

E-everlasting:if you claim to love someone it should not be a one day thing or a one week thing or a fortnight thing or a one year thing or a one decade thing or a one century thing if we will live that long. love should be a forever thing.

One should also understand the person one loves that is to say there should be mutual understanding between you two.

There should also be this trust between you and the person you love.this unbreakable bonding trust that no other person can fathom.

Learn to accept the one you love for who she or he is not what he or she is. Adaz in his song zaro kome said primitive na somebody wife,lazy girl na somebody darling,talkative na somebody sweetheart, dirty girl na somebody honey.one mans food is another mans poison. lol

Also learn to accept when you're wrong,forgive easily,dont push the one you love too far cause you just might end up pushing them away and you will end up being sorry for the rest of your life.

still pondering on that adage i grew up hearing around that love is blind...is it? well personally i think what that adage was trying to say is you love one with flaws and all. cause ordinarily i won't say love is blind cause you won't open your eyes wide and go marry a broke arse...pardon me.

i will drop my pen here sweets....this is really just the beginning.
Good morning to my family,friends and loved ones.welcome to a new week and happy sunday,do go to church to my christian peeps and asalatu to my muslim peeps.do have a blissful,peaceful,lovely and wonderful week ahead and may ur week be filled wiv ME(favour)...lol.i love you all

after a very looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong while

It feels so good doing this after a very long while. i sure did miss out.....well not my fault my lovely and wonderful friends and followers of the blog....been so busy with school....pheew! resumed school,had loads of term papers,test,assignments,had to defend my term paper and even exam! so please pardon me...affirmative you can see how busy i have been.....some mad hectic crazy stuffs!!!!
In between this mad busy schedule i sure did have fun,met cool people,made new friends.decided to diversify that is to say add more spice to this blog to make it more sumtuos for your reading pleasure. because as you know my number one priority is making you guys happy! so from now on it's not just gonna be a me thing......so get ready for the grand transformation....peace!